On another mundane morning, Saitama woke up after a brutal battle with his blanket… and, as usual, he lost.
Dragging his lifeless feet toward the fridge, he pondered deeply:
Is life worth living if the fridge is empty?
Can a hero save the world while his stomach growls like the wails of tortured souls?
Wait, hold on... there's an egg!
He opened the fridge...
It exploded.
No, literally—exploded. Out of it came a strange creature, looking like a mutated slab of butter wearing a kitchen helmet, screaming like a blender dying a slow death:
"I am General Freezoro, Lord of the Cold, and Commander of the Expired Goods Army! I've come for revenge!"
Saitama stared at it with his usual blank expression:
"Oh… I forgot to throw out the cheese last year."
Before he could react, a familiar voice came from the window:
"SAAAAITAMAAAAAA!!!"
Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap…
Yes, it was Tatsumaki.
She opened the window herself this time, because apparently, privacy doesn't apply to Saitama, and stormed in, shouting:
"Who's this idiot? Why are you blowing up your kitchen? And why haven't you done the dishes?"
"Good question," said General Freezoro. "Why hasn't he done the dishes? We noticed that too during surveillance."
Saitama ignored everyone and approached the egg that remained on the ground after the explosion, picked it up, stared at it, then said:
"It's still intact… nice."
Suddenly, Genos broke through the door as usual, yelling:
"Sensei!! Are you alright? I picked up thermal readings showing a dragon-level fight inside the fridge!!"
"Genos."
"Yes, Sensei?"
"Open the windows. The smell of cheese is burning my eyes."
But Freezoro wasn't in the mood for jokes. He raised his hands, and spoiled vegetables began to fly through the air, turning into organic missiles firing green flames like expired soup.
Tatsumaki raised an eyebrow:
"Do you expect me to fight a salad?"
But she did. And with way too much force.
Everything exploded. The windows, the fridge, the TV, even an odd picture on the wall that Saitama had forgotten he put there.
And as the smoke cleared...
Saitama sat on the floor, staring at his egg that had turned to charcoal, whispering sadly:
"Goodbye... my breakfast."
Genos bowed in front of him:
"You sacrificed your breakfast for peace, Sensei… how amazing you are."
Tatsumaki plopped down on the couch and said:
"I'm hungry. Order pizza."
Saitama sighed and then said:
"Fine, but this one's on you."