AT THE SAME TIME
VANESSA'S POINT OF VIEW:
I sit across from Laura, my fingers tightly gripping the edges of the chair. Her gaze is sharp but not unkind. I can feel the weight of her eyes on me, digging more profound than any simple questions ever could.
"So." Laura said, her voice steady but laced with curiosity. "Who are you?"
My breath catches in my throat. The words almost choke me, but I force them out, the truth slipping like poison from my lips.
"My real name... is Vanessa." I said, my voice almost a whisper, as though saying it out loud makes it more accurate, more dangerous.
Laura doesn't react immediately. She just nods slowly, processing. I can feel her mind working, piecing the truth together.
"Vanessa." She repeats, testing the name on her tongue. "And how did you get here? What brought you to the Academy?"
I bite my lip, remembering the cold, endless nights spent alone in the forest. The gnawing hunger, the desperate search for shelter. The exhaustion weighed on my bones every day, pushing me further toward a breaking point.
"It wasn't easy." I started, my voice shaking as I look down at my hands, suddenly unsure. "I lived in the forest... for years, scavenging for food, hiding from danger. Every day was a fight to survive, just to stay alive long enough to find something to eat."
My throat tightens as the memories flood in. The hunger. The cold. The endless fear.
"I didn't have a choice. The hunger was worse than anything else." I whisper, my eyes clouding over. "I... I had to steal the uniform. It was the only way I could get in. They wouldn't let someone like me in otherwise."
I clench my fists under the table. I remember what it was like to feel like I had no place in the world, to be invisible, to be nobody. But I had to get here. I had to.
"And then there was the monster." I said, my voice cracking. "I killed it to save... him." The words catch in my throat. "Xavier."
Laura's eyes widen at the mention of his name. She leaned forward, her gaze now piercing and intense.
"You saved him?" She asked quietly, disbelief mixed with something else, respect, maybe.
But still, she doesn't know the full story. She doesn't know how I nearly died doing it.
"Yeah. I saved him. I bandaged him up because he didn't even know what was happening. And then, I... I came here. I made my way to the Academy." My voice faltered. "I didn't know what else to do. I thought, maybe... maybe this would be my only chance to survive. I stole a dead man uniform and stole its identity to be able to study here."
A silence hangs between us, thick and heavy. I see Laura's eyes soften, but she's still processing everything. The weight of my story. She leans back in her chair, and for a moment, she doesn't speak, as if trying to understand what was going on.
"I had no idea." She murmured finally, her voice gentle, but also... protective. "You've been through so much. You're stronger than you think."
I'm not sure how to respond. Her words hit deeper than I expected. For so long, I've been alone, surviving on my own. But this... this feels different. She sees me. Really sees me.
"I didn't have a choice." I repeated, my voice barely above a whisper. "I had to be strong... or I wouldn't have made it."
Laura watches me carefully. There's an understanding in her gaze. She knows what it's like to be underestimated, to have to fight every single day just to survive.
"Vanessa." She said softly, the name leaving her mouth like a promise. "I want to help you. I know you're afraid, afraid that if you let anyone in, they'll see you as weak. But you're not weak. You're not what you think you are."
I felt a sharp pang in my chest, and I quickly look away. I'm not sure I believe her. I've been hiding for so long, pretending to be someone I'm not. If anyone knew the truth about me, about my hunger, my struggle to survive they might see me as a failure.
"I can't trust anyone." I said, my voice breaking. "Not after everything I've been through."
She stands up slowly, walking over to me. Her voice is soft but firm, as if she's trying to put something important into my mind.
"You don't have to do this alone." She said, her hand gently resting on my shoulder. "You don't have to keep running. I can help you, Vanessa. But you need to let me. You need to trust me."
For a moment, I feel a tear slide down my cheek. I quickly wipe it away, but Laura sees it. Her eyes soften, and for the first time in a long while, I feel... safe. Safe enough to let the walls fall.
"I'm scared." I admitted, the words tumbling out without warning. "I'm scared of being exposed. Of people finding out what I am."
Laura doesn't flinch. She simply nods, understanding the fear that's been eating away at me for so long.
"It's okay to be scared. But you don't have to hide anymore." Laura said.
I swallowed hard, my chest tightening. For so long, I've had to pretend, to fight, to survive. But with Laura... I don't have to pretend anymore. Not here. Not with her.
"You won't tell anyone, will you?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. "Please, I can't..."
She cuts me off gently.
"I won't tell anyone, Vanessa. I promise."She said."Where do you live, Vanessa?"
Her voice is gentle, but it feels like the question is too big like I can't just answer with a simple 'here and there.' I clench my hands in my lap, my nails digging into my palms. It's such a simple question, but it makes the old, bitter feeling rise up inside me. The feeling of not having a real home. Not having anywhere safe to go.
"The forest." I said quietly, looking down at my hands, not meeting her eyes. "I... I've lived there for years, in the trees. Near the edge of the mountains. It's... It's all I've known." My voice cracks slightly, but I try to push through it.
Laura's silence makes the room feel smaller, pressing down on me. I can almost hear the gears turning in her head. She's piecing it all together, the hunger, the isolation, the years I spent surviving alone. She knows I'm not just some student who stumbled in here because of some stroke of luck. She knows there's more.
"And what about food? How do you eat? What do you eat?" She asked, almost cautiously, as if afraid to hear the answer.
But I already know she's not going to let it go. I have to say it, I have to tell her everything.
"I..." I hesitate, swallowing hard. "I... I barely eat anything. Just enough to keep going. Fruit, nuts, whatever I can scrounge up. Once in a while I use cafeteria but I scared, so I basicly eat things that I know off." I feel the familiar ache in my stomach, the way it twists when I haven't eaten in too long. "Sometimes it's animals I've hunted. But it's never enough."
The words leave a bitter taste in my mouth. I don't want to admit this to anyone, let alone her. I want to seem stronger. But Laura isn't giving me a way out. She wants the truth. All of it. And I can't hide anymore.
"I have to keep moving." I continue, my voice quiet, distant. "I can't stay in one place for too long. The cold is... brutal. The nights are worse." My hands tremble, and I curl them into fists. I can't remember the last time I slept in a warm bed, the last time I didn't wake up shivering in the cold or with hunger gnawing at me.
Laura's gaze softens, her eyes filled with something that almost looks like pity, but it's more than that. There's concern in her eyes real, genuine concern. And that makes me want to run.
I clear my throat, not wanting to hear the words I know are coming next.
"But I'm here now. I'm not... I'm not asking for charity. I'm just... trying to survive." My voice drops, and I feel like I'm sinking back into the shadows I've been hiding in for so long. I'm not ready to face this. Not with her. Not with anyone.
But Laura doesn't look at me like I'm some lost, broken thing. She doesn't recoil or show that kind of disgust I've seen from others. Instead, her face softens even more, and she reaches across the table, placing her hand gently on mine.
"Vanessa..." She said my name with a tenderness that almost breaks me. "You don't have to do this alone anymore. I know it's been hard. I know it feels like you've had to fight every step of the way. But I promise you, you don't have to carry all of this by yourself anymore."
I feel the tears welling up in my eyes, but I blink them away quickly. I can't cry. Not now. Not in front of her. But the weight of everything is too much, and for the first time in so long, I let myself believe that maybe, just maybe, I don't have to keep fighting alone.
"You don't understand." I whispered, my voice breaking. "I've been alone for so long. No one cares. No one knows what it's like... to feel this hungry. To be so cold. So... empty."
"You're not empty."She said firmly, squeezing my hand. "You've survived. That means something. You're not just some stray, Vanessa. You're strong. Stronger than you think. And I want to help you."
I look up at her, surprised by the fierce determination in her eyes. Laura sees me. Really sees me. Not as some broken girl who's barely holding on. But as someone worth saving. Someone worth helping.
"But how?" I whispered, my heart pounding in my chest. "How do I even start... when all I've known is survival?"
Laura smiles softly, and it's the first real smile I've seen from her.
"One step at a time. Let's take it slow, okay? We'll figure this out together."She said.
I nod slowly, the weight on my chest starting to lighten just a little. I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe I'm letting someone in. But maybe... maybe for the first time, I don't have to be alone anymore.