It was supposed to be a simple errand—pick up some tofu, green onions, and Hu Tao's latest obsession: "super-crispy fish sticks." But as Aether would soon discover, no ordinary day was ever truly ordinary when your wife was Hu Tao.
The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and Liyue's supermarket was alive with weekend bustle. Families shopped with lists in hand, employees restocked shelves, and somewhere in the distance, soft pop music played through the speakers. Aether pushed a shopping cart with the calm demeanor of a man on a mission. Hu Tao, on the other hand, danced ahead like a child in a candy store—literally. The moment she saw a sale on peach-flavored gummies, she vanished into the candy aisle.
"Hu Tao," Aether called with a sigh. "We came here for groceries, not sugar bombs."
"But Aether!" she shouted back with an innocent grin, holding up a jumbo-sized bag of gummies. "They're limited edition!"
Knowing better than to argue with her "logic," he simply added it to the cart with a shake of his head and a faint smile. But the chaos was only beginning.
As they moved into the produce section, Hu Tao decided it was the perfect moment for... grocery cart surfing. She jumped onto the front of the cart, arms outstretched, shouting "Full speed ahead, Captain Aether!" Her dramatic entrance caused a nearby stack of cabbages to tremble—and then collapse.
Cabbages rolled across the polished floor like green bowling balls, causing nearby shoppers to scatter in confusion. Aether froze, eyes wide, as a store employee approached looking equally stunned and mildly horrified.
"I swear," Aether muttered, "we were just looking for tofu."
Hu Tao, completely unfazed, offered a quick apology and helped restack the cabbages—with flair, of course. "Think of it as surprise cardio!" she chirped.
Things escalated further at checkout.
The self-checkout lane seemed harmless enough—until Hu Tao accidentally scanned the same fish stick box six times. "Oops," she said with a sheepish grin, staring at the growing total. "Guess we're having a lot of fish sticks this week!"
Aether stepped in, correcting the mistake with practiced ease. The cashier, watching this duo with quiet amusement, leaned over and whispered, "You two are like a sitcom waiting to happen."
"I think we are the sitcom," Aether replied, giving Hu Tao a sideways glance as she tried to sneak one last item onto the belt: a novelty hat shaped like a dumpling.
They finally made it out of the store, bags in hand and dignity somewhat intact. On the walk home, Hu Tao looped her arm through Aether's and sighed contentedly. "You know," she said, "I think grocery shopping is way more fun now than it was during the age of magic. There's chaos, there's drama, there's... dumpling hats."
Aether chuckled. "And you wonder why we're banned from three stores already."
They walked off into the golden light of late afternoon, their bags swinging and laughter trailing behind them. Ordinary errands had never been so hilariously exhausting.