I'm sitting in the classroom bright and early, my face sporting the presence of a smile that hasn't faded at all ever since the events of the DNA test. Not only did I find out that Toshinori isn't my biological father, but I also horribly embarrassed both of the Yagi adults! They don't even have the excuse that they were tricked since both Izumi and I were tested and came out as (unfortunately) being confirmed to be Inko's children.
Which means that not only is Inko a two-timing whore, but that Toshinori Yagi, All Might, the Symbol of Peace… got cucked! And it was announced on national television! I hadn't thought that the situation could get any better, but apparently they were only dating at the time, and it was Inko's announcement that she was pregnant that prompted them to get married in the first place!
Judging by how much the two were yelling at each other on that stage, I think it's a safe bet that they'll be divorced before too long. Maybe if they had one child who cared about them there would be a chance to mend the relationship, but Izumi's reaction to the announcements doesn't inspire much confidence on that front. She was shocked when she found out that she wasn't related to All Might, obviously, but when it was announced that she is related to Inko? I searched up one of the recordings posted online, zoomed in on her face, and saved the abject disappointment and despair present there as the screensaver for my phone!
So, overall - even with my internships being cut short - I have had a very good, very productive week~! I wonder how all the other members of the class have been doing? At the very least, I'm hopeful that the alternate internship I proposed to Yaoyorozu worked out better than it would have if she'd gone through with her initial choice of Uwabami.
They don't call him the Bullshit Hero: Pack Rat for nothing!
The door opens and, speak of the devil, Yaoyorozu is the first to walk through! Seeing me, her first reaction is both baffling and completely understandable.
She manifests a gun in her hand, takes aim, and shoots a paintball right at my throat! I dutifully make the expected noises of pain while gagging, holding my throat and falling sideways off my chair while trying to catch my breath. Meanwhile, the heiress nods in satisfaction before making… some kind of liquid in the palm of her hand and… did she just melt her paintball gun?
I shoot to my feet and try to question her about how the hell she did that, but am stymied by a violent coughing fit since I still can't get enough air into my stupid lungs! Curse you human biology, why must you require an adequate amount of air before I can interrogate my vic- *cough* friends!? Thankfully she's nice enough to talk to me before I regain the ability to talk.
"I would like to thank you for your input on who would provide me the best benefit to learn under, however I would also like to curse your name and bloodline for suggesting I intern under," the raven-haired girl is wracked by a full body shudder, "that man." She shakes her head to clear whatever memories were prompted at the reference to Pack Rat. "Suffice to say that I hope to never see a hero such as that ever again." Without another word she goes to her seat and sits down, putting a glowing finger in her mouth and… judging by the way her throat is moving she's making something to drink?
Huh. That's an interesting concept. Depending on who you ask it would probably be considered an idiotic use of her quirk, or a brilliant one. Sure, her body is using resources that are literally regained in the same moment, essentially doing nothing, but she's still getting the taste of whatever it is she's drinking, and most likely any superfluous effects like she'd get from drinking something like coffee or tea from another source.
Suffice to say that the moment I gain enough air to speak I immediately devolve into a muttering rant about the possibilities. I'm only broken from theorizing about the possibilities by someone throwing an arm around my shoulder, accompanied by a tingle of electricity. I don't even have to turn my head to know that it's Kaminari.
"Usagi! Thanks for writing that letter for me, I had no idea that Static Shock was in Japan!" I can't help but chuckle, reassuring the joyful blonde that it was no issue. It's not exactly unknown for foreign heroes to show up in person to watch UA's Sports Festival, but it is that they can take the students as interns the same as any 'local' hero. Of course, the caveat is that they aren't allowed to make offers, so the student would have to not only have an interest in interning with them, know that they can intern with them, but also ask themselves if they can intern with the hero, which they would need to get a meeting with them to accomplish!
The HPSC probably made it so difficult to do so in an effort to make sure their future heroes don't get tempted to work for another country based on what the foreign heroes might tell the students.
"Dude, did you know that the hero system in Japan is kind of, like, really fucked up?"
…Which is a valid concern considering that other countries treat their heroes as more of a peace keeping force than as celebrities. Even countries that maintain a ranking system, like in America, hold heroes to a higher accountability than Japan. Sure, there are people like Captain Celebrity, but even with him being a terrible womanizer he does his job effectively! Basically the ranking system there is more about effectiveness than popularity.
"So," I say, redirecting his attention to the reason I suggested the American hero in the first place, "could he help you with your problem?"
He beams at me with a volt-filled smile, literally, electricity sparking across his teeth. "Yep! Helped fix the electromagnetic field around my head right up! Still have to be careful about going over the amount of watts I let loose, but now I won't knock myself out of commission by accident!"
"That's great!" I beam back at him, then take a look around the room and realize that most of the rest of the class has shown up, gathered in their closer friend groups and chatting about what they did while working under their chosen heroes. Apparently Jiro played scout for a building full of hostages, and Uraraka is giving off an impressively intimidating aura (for someone so nonthreatening) that she acquired from Gunhead's agency.
…Did Tsu just tell Ashido and Hagakure that she got tongue slammed into the ground by a drug-smuggling octopus? Pretty sure that's not the type of thing you go around advertising, but I'm not gonna kink shame. Plus I like how blunt she is about everything.
The only ones missing from the class are Iida (for obvious reasons), Kachan, and the grape. To the great despair of everyone assembled though, the blonde who is much less pleasant to be around than the one who's dragged Jiro over to talk with us enters only moments later. His eyes immediately zero in on me, but to the gratitude of most of the room, his red-haired handler forces him into his own friend group, talking his ear off. I silently pray to Cthulhu for the poor pink girl's well-being, since it's obvious to everyone (except apparently the afore-mentioned redhead) that she has absolutely no interest in being in the explosive boy's company. Why the rocky boy does is a mystery to all, though with how he talks about his quirk I have my suspicions…
Aizawa, the teacher with incredibly questionable teaching credentials, comes into the room with a furious scowl on his face and dragging the resident grapist behind him, completely wrapped in the man's scarf. A quick flick and the midget is thrown spinning into his seat. He sits up and opens his mouth to presumably object to his treatment, but is silenced by the hero activating his quirk and glaring at him with glowing red eyes. "Stay silent, stay still. If I get a single outburst from you, you're expelled."
You know, that threat would probably be more effective if he wasn't threatening to expel basically the entire class every other class. Which makes me wonder how often he's made the threat in the past considering that I've only had him a week, but the other students all seemed used to it.
He shifts his glare to the rest of us, pausing a moment after realizing that everyone got into their seats the moment the door opened and he doesn't actually have a reason to complain about us. But what kind of hero would give up just because of that? "There were a number of idiotic decisions made by the students in this class, but I'll stick with informing you about the worst one. Tenya Iida has been expelled for abandoning the hero he was interning with during a crisis and attempting vigilantism against the Hero Killer: Stain."
There are shocked gasps, a number of the students turn to stare at me, and a small few voices have the bravery to rise up to object to the punishment. Of course, the most common emotion put on display is confusion, since it was Shoko and I who are known to have brought Stain to the police before I executed him. Letting an exhausted sigh spill from his lips.
"There are a number of reasons for this decision, but the most direct one to explain is 'politics'." Like a shroud, silence covers the room. Not sure why they're surprised though, because, you know, it's politics. "Iida did not only go after Stain despite being explicitly told by the hero he was interning under to help evacuate civilians, but he also did not go to try and arrest him." He levels a glare at the students. "He planned to kill the Hero Killer."
A stillness, that's the only way to describe what the room is like as the class absorbs this new information. Though the confusion remains considering that, while Iida attempted to kill a man, I actually did, yet am still here. But that ties back into politics, so they really shouldn't be surprised. But before the first voice can rise up to question him further, the door opens yet again.
There's no other way to describe how the blue-haired girl enters the classroom than to say she bounces. In a number of ways. "Hi, hi," she waves happily at us, completely ignoring Aizawa's glare. "I heard that the first year couple who stopped the hero killer are in this class! And one of them's a villain too!" Her eyes zero in on me, and with a gleam in her eyes she bounces over to me, her hands clenched into fists held close to her chest in excitement as she rapid-fires questions at me.
"Hi! You're Midosagi, right? Why're you a villain? How do you feel knowing All Might isn't your dad? How did you pull off killing Stain in such an action movie-like way? Why use a gun? Have you realized that Todoroki likes you yet? Why doesn't your hero costume have rabbit ears? Your hair is fluffy, can I pet it? You're cute, wanna-"
"Eeep!" Her questions are brought to a very sudden stop as a result of being encased in ice up to her neck. Following the trail across the floor, it's clear that there's only one culprit that can be responsible for the freezing, who looks completely unrepentant. Shoko just glares at the spiral haired girl.
Aizawa sighs, but before he can berate the dual-quirked girl, the one in a third year's uniform lets out an exaggerated sigh before declaring in monotone, "Oh no, I've been caught. Whatever shall I do?" She tilts her head to the side as her head starts to melt. "Well, I guess since there is a deal going on between UA and the League of Villains, it means that I need to join Izu in class!"
It's less than a minute later that Himi's grinning face replaces the unfamiliar girl's, beaming happily at me. "Surprise!"
I can't help but chuckle at her antics, while also being very happy. Sure, I'd rather she not be stuck in UA with me, but on the other hand, I'm very glad that she'll be stuck in UA with me! But there is one problem…
"What about Eri?"
Before she can answer a head sporting blue, large spiraled hair pokes through the still open doorway, followed by a head sporting silver, long spiraled hair poking in lower than the first. "Huh? They found out the trick so fast!"
I raise an eyebrow at Himi, who looks completely unapologetic.
Well, this is certainly going to be interesting.